Mi Choza De Nipa

By Dr Bill Maier It’s nice to live within driving distance of relatives, but it can also create problems, especially when they assume you’ve got an open-door policy . In- laws are notorious for dropping by uninvited. When you’re newlyweds, they’re usually so happy to have you close by that they forget to draw boundaries. In these cases, it’s important to set some ground rules — respectfully, but firmly. I suggest you sit down together and start by telling them how much you love and appreciate them. Then explain that you’re trying to establish your new life together, and privacy is an important part of that. Tell them they’re always welcome, but you’d prefer them to call ahead of time. Most in-laws will understand. If they don’t, there are some deeper boundary issues that need to be addressed. And that’s a whole other subject. From TODAY, Voices - Thursday, 17-June-2010 ----- Related articles by Zemanta Harvard Business: Good Communication Goes Beyond Open Door Po...

Image by Jeffry B via Flickr By Dr Bill Maier It’s always tough to hear that someone’s getting a divorce . But what about when that “someone” is your child? There’s nothing quite as devastating as a divorce in the family and when your own child is involved the pain and shock can feel unbearable. You want to protect them but you don’t know how. The best you can do is to simply be there for them — physically and emotionally. Your first step should be to discern whether there’s any chance of reconciliation. You might even encourage them to postpone the divorce until they’ve had a chance to go through marital counselling. But keep in mind that the decision isn’t yours to make. If they decide to go through with the divorce, give your unconditional support and stay with them. Be ready with advice and counsel but only when asked. Above all, don’t pass judgment — on your child or their spouse. What they need is support, not more guilt. From TODAY, Voices - Thursday, 06-May-2010...

By Dr Bill Maier So what does it take to make a strong marriage ? Most people would say "love", and they are partly right. Love is critical to a successful marriage and most people would never get married without it. But young love is often nothing more than infatuation , and that is not enough to keep a couple together. So what about a love that is deep and mature — is that what it takes? Some might say "yes", but even the deepest love will not keep a marriage from being tested. The strongest marriages do not rely on infatuation or even love to keep them strong. They build their relationships on commitment. The difference is that commitment is an act of the will, not an emotion of the heart. It is two people saying to each other, "I know there will be tough times in our marriage and that we will not always feel like being together. But in spite of how we feel, we will commit to doing whatever it takes to make this marriage work". From TODAY, Voices – Thur...

LAW AND ORDER But recidivism rate of 25.1% in 2006 represents 'excellent result' when compared to other countries: Shanmugam ----- Leong Wee Keat, weekeat@mediacorp.com.sg RECIDIVISM, which measures the rate of ex-offenders returning to crime, climbed slightly for those released in 2006. One out of every four ex-offenders went back to crime within two years of their release. This increase marks the second consecutive year relapse rates have climbed: after falling from 31.2 per cent in 2002 to 23.7 per cent in 2004, re-offending rates climbed to 24.2 per cent and 25.1 per cent for the next two years. Still, the recidivism rate for 2006 represents "an excellent result", when compared with similar penal systems in other developed countries , said Minister for Law and Second Minister for Home Affairs K Shanmugam yesterday. Calling it "unrealistic" to expect the recidivism rate to continuously decrease each year, Mr Shanmugam said the decreasing trend would oft...