Of Birds and Nests

From FOCUS ON THE FAMILY, Today, 16-May-2008 edition

 

Of Birds And Nests

By Dr James Dobson

 

One of the most difficult passages in life occurs when a child

grows up and leaves home. As parents, we should look for

opportunities to prepare our kids and ourselves for this

important transition.

 

I remember an occasion when our children were young.

A little bird had built its nest in a rose bush in our backyard

and our kids were fascinated by the baby birds. I warned them

to keep their distance.

 

But one day, Danae got a little too close and frightened the birds,

causing them to jump out of the nest. We tried putting them back,

but just as soon as we did, they would jump out and run again.

 

I used the experience to teach Danae a very valuable lesson.

I told her: “You see, Danae, once you’ve jumped out of our nest

and seen the adult world, you will never again feel the same way

about living here. You’ll want to come for a visit, and you will always be

welcome – but it will never be quite the same. You will be a grown-up

and will want to have your own home. That’s just the way the

system works.”

 

In that brief moment, I was able to lay the groundwork for a

future phase of her life. It was a simple lesson, but one that she

understood. And when the time did arrive for her to go off

to university, it made the transition that much easier. You can

find ways to convey that same message to your children.

A Father's Influence

From FOCUS ON THE FAMILY, Today, 15-May-2008 edition

 

A Father’s Influence

By Dr James Dobson

 

Some years ago, a greeting card company decided to do

something special for Mother’s Day. They set up a table

in a federal prison, inviting any inmate who so desired

to send a free card to his mother.

 

The lines were so long that they had to make another trip

to the factory for more cards. Due to the success of the event,

they decided to do the same thing on Father’s Day. Only this time,

not one prisoner felt the need to send a card to Dad and many

had no idea even who their fathers were.

 

Contrast that story with a conversation I once had with a man

named Bill Haughton, who was president of a large construction firm.

 

I asked him: “When you are thinking of hiring an employee –

especially a man – what do you look for?”

 

He said, “I look primarily at the relationship between the man

and his father. If he felt loved by his dad and respected his authority,

he’s likely to be a good employee.”

 

Then he added, “I won’t hire a young man who has been in rebellion

against his dad. He will have difficulty with me, too.” Fathers, never

underestimate the influence you have on your children, both your

sons and your daughters.

Strength Through Adversity

From FOCUS ON THE FAMILY, Today, 14-May-2008 edition

 

Strength Through Adversity

By Dr James Dobson

 

Someone once said that if you were to remove the rocks

from a brook, it would lose its song. Well, that holds true

for you and me as well.

 

Author Scott Walker tells of the time he was asked to help

some friends dig through the ashes of their house after a fire.

When they arrived, all that was left standing was a portion

of the outer brick wall. Nothing had survived the blaze.

 

But while sifting through the debris, Walker came across a tiny,

china bluebird. A few hairline cracks had formed in the glaze

but beyond that, it remained intact.

 

A story of the heat of the night, of terror and of survival against

great odds. And then, the crucial question hit me. Why did this

china bluebird survive?

 

It had survived the fire because it had been tested by fire.

 

And so it is with human beings who have been refined in life’s

raging furnace. They are tougher, harder and more resilient

than those who have never faced difficulty and loss.

 

That understanding may help us cope the next time the heat

is turned up on our tranquil little world.

Take Another Run At Life

From FOCUS ON THE FAMILY, Today, 13-May-2008 edition

 

Take Another Run At Life

By Dr James Dobson

 

The year was 1913: Douglas Mawson and his two companions

found themselves about 500m from camp in a blinding blizzard.

 

While making their way back, one fell to his death in a crevice,

taking with him most of the food, provisions for their dogs

and their only tent. Soon, the other companion died of

hypothermia.

 

Alone and suffering from stomach cramps, delusions and

severe fatigue, Mawson also stumbled into a crevice.

 

For the first time in his life, he contemplated giving up.

“How easy to simply let go and end all the pain and toil,”

he thought.

 

Instead, with all the strength he could muster, he pulled himself

out of the crevice and continued to make his way back to camp.

 

Mawson survived the ordeal and returned to Australia,

where he was knighted and hailed a hero. He died at a ripe old age

of 76, after a happy and prosperous life.

 

Are you about to give up, to cut the harness and plunge into the abyss?

 

If so, I urge you to gut it out and take another run at life. History

is replete with examples of men and women who have persevered

and succeeded when nothing but hope remained.

Act Early for Learning Disability

From FOCUS ON THE FAMILY, Today, 12-May-2008 edition

 

Act Early for Learning Disability

By Dr James Dobson

 

Some experiments have been done where the walleye pike

is placed in a big tank of water, followed by minnows which

the walleye very quickly consumes.

 

A large piece of glass is then slid down the centre of the tank,

with the walleye pike on one side and the minnows on the other.

The pike swims after the minnows and inevitably hits the glass.

It tries again but crashes into the divider again. Very quickly,

it will get discouraged and even quit trying to get the minnows.

 

At that point, the researchers slide the glass out of the tank

and let the minnows swim in and around the pike.

 

Believe it or not, a walleye pike will starve to death in a tank

filled with the kind of food that he loves best, simply because

he’s become discouraged.

 

So it is with children who fail in their early school experiences.

If their efforts only bring frustration, some of them just quit trying.

That’s why early educational intervention is absolutely critical

for the child with a learning disability. You have to reach him or her

before the paralysis of discouragement sets in.

Use TV Time Wisely

From FOCUS ON THE FAMILY, Today, 09-May-2008 edition

 

Use TV Time Wisely

By Dr Bill Maier

 

We’ve all heard the statistics about kids spending more time

in front of the television than interacting with their friends

or family. We also know how much bad stuff there is on TV.

 

But is there a way to teach kids good viewing habits

without throwing the television out of the window?

 

Why not use the television as a tool for positive training?

You can use the chance to talk about the troubling issues

that may arise with the characters.

 

Point out positive behaviour, as well as unacceptable ones.

Even family shows depict poor values at times and when

they do, say something like “We don’t agree with that

in our family, do we kids?”

 

Then encourage them to tell you why. This is a great way

to teach discernment to your children.

 

Obviously, TV viewing should be limited, but when you do

watch with your kids, use the time wisely.