Mi Choza De Nipa: 09/27/2009

Friday, October 02, 2009

For Better or for… what?

By Dr James Dobson

Have you heard the one about the wedding ceremony where the minister said: "Do you take this woman for better or for worse? For richer or for poorer? In sickness and in health?" And the groom replied: "Yes, no, yes, no, no, yes."

Of course we'd all like to sign up for the better parts when we get married and forget all that other stuff but that's not the way marriage works because that's not the way life works.

Many young people go into marriage today with one eye on the exit door. They intend to stay together as long as it seems advantageous to do so. But in most of these unfortunate cases, a painful divorce is just a matter of time. Because trouble in life is inevitable and the uncommitted marital relationship can be victimised when hard times inevitably descend upon it.

But the good news is that a strong marriage can be a fortress against the stresses of life. The key to a lifelong relationship then, in good times and bad, is an ironclad commitment of the will.

From TODAY, Voices – Thursday, 03-Sep-2009

Thursday, October 01, 2009

Parental Guilt

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By Dr James Dobson

In case you haven't noticed, parenthood is a very guilt-producing endeavor, even for the dedicated professional.

Since there's no such creature as a perfect parent, we subject ourselves to a constant cross-examination in the courtroom of parental acceptability.

Round and round go the self-doubts and recriminations, and guilt becomes a constant companion. The best way to handle guilt is to face it squarely, using it as a source of motivation for change where warranted. I would suggest that parents sit down together and discuss their feelings. Write down your most troubling parental shortcomings. Then ask yourselves: "Is my guilt valid? Can I do anything about it?"

Remember that none of us can be perfect parents. We get tired and frustrated, and disappointed and irritable, and it can affect the way we approach those little ones around our feet.

Fortunately, we are permitted to make many mistakes through the years, provided the overall tone is somewhere near the right note.

From TODAY, Voices – Wednesday, 02-Sep-2009

Monday, September 28, 2009

Teaching Children to Work

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By Dr James Dobson

Why do some children love to work, and others get depressed just thinking about it? Generally speaking, children learn what they have been taught.

Some well-meaning parents think childhood should not be encumbered by work. But, if children aren't at least exposed to work at a young age, they may fail to develop the persistence and initiative required for successful living.

Author Jean Lush says household chores should be divided into two general categories: Routine contributions and extra jobs. Routines, such as making beds or emptying dustbins, should be part of children's unpaid responsibilities.

But extra jobs should provide opportunities to earn additional money. Furthermore, children learn by imitation, so concentrate on hands-on instruction.

Working with an adult is the most enriching form of play for a child when handled correctly. Of course, teaching children how to work is itself difficult for parents. But the benefits of your time and effort will be evident when your child is productive and responsible later on.

From TODAY, Voices – Tuesday, 01-Sep-2009