Mi Choza De Nipa

By Dr Bill Maier Are you looking for a good way to strengthen your marriage ? Try playing tennis with your spouse, or going on a bike ride. It is a fact that couples who play together tend to stay together. Men place a great deal of importance on shared activities with their spouse, while women tend to thrive on emotional intimacy , which usually comes through just being together. My wife and I are into hiking and mountain biking and we've used those activities to bond, as well as to build a lot of great memories. Some of our best conversations have taken place on the hiking trail or on the bike path. The quickest way to let passion plummet in a relationship is to disconnect. If he's always off playing golf with his buddies, and she's meeting with her hobby club, emotional intimacy can fall by the wayside. The strongest couples learn to develop shared interests and ...

On some points, I agree with the writer… two becoming one doesn't necessarily mean enslaving or dominating or dissolving the other person completely; the unity is simply more than just what we perceive. There is more to a person than what we see or hear. The unspoken and unheard, the unuttered and unannounced, the hushed… when becoming one means being one in thought, but not in the execution, one in mind, but not in the action… one in emotion, but different in the presentation or display of affection… ----- btw: ON DIFFERENCES IN A RELATIONSHIP ANA OW MY HUSBAND cannot see the light – when it comes to the styles of furnishings and fixtures that I prefer for our new apartment, that is. D and I have been shopping for pendant lights over the past few weekends and the number of items that we both like are a dismal few. "Sorry, but we are not having a pseudo-baroque chandelier in our bedroom," was D's last word on the matter after a couple of minor spats. He did, however,...

FOCUS ON THE FAMILY From TODAY, Voices Friday, 30-January-2009 By Dr Bill Maier One of the greatest gifts you can give your mate is to believe in them. Sometimes the difference between pursuing a dream and staying on the couch is as simple as having somebody say: “You can do it!” And what better way to strengthen your mate’s self-esteem than to encourage them when they have a goal? One of a husband’s greatest needs is to have a wife who respects and believes in him, no matter what. Even when we fail, we want to think that our wives are behind us, cheering us on, saying: “Don’t worry about that; you’ll make it next time!” And wives need a husband who will listen to their dreams and encourage them to pursue their goals and to stay the course, no matter how hard it gets. When life knocks us for a loop, it’s nice to know there’s somebody in our corner cheering us on. Never underestimate the power of believing in your spouse.

FOCUS ON THE FAMILY From TODAY, Voices Thursday, 29-January-2009 By Dr Bill Maier What would you say is the most important asset in a marriage? According to Drs Les and Leslie Parrot, the most important asset is your attitude. It’s the one thing that you have total control over – even when everything around you seems out of control. For example, if you are miserable today, you could probably point to a set of circumstances that made you that way. But you’d be wrong. It’s not what happens that makes us unhappy; it’s our attitude toward it. And attitude is a choice. Mr Chuck Swindoll once said that life is 10 per cent what happens to us and 90 per cent how we react to it. Happy couples aren’t happy because everything always goes their way. They’re happy because they choose to rise above their circumstances and take charge of how they will and won’t react to them. Using a baseball analogy, when life throws you a curve ball, you shake it off, smile and wait for the next pitch.

From TODAY, Voices Thursday, 15-January-2009 Another area of personality, where the opposite sexes look at differently, perceive differently, and experience it differently. A short article, but read on. It will help you, if not now, in the future...

From TODAY, Voices Thursday August 28, 2008 By Dr Bill Maier Any marriage counsellor can tell you the most common complaint they hear from wives is: “He doesn’t talk to me any more.” When couples are dating they spend hours on the phone, talking and laughing together, completely losing track of time. But too often something happens just a couple of years into the marriage. They find themselves with nothing to talk about. Communication is crucial to the success of a marriage, yet many guys are wired to keep to themselves. It’s not that they’re bored with their spouse; they just don’t understand the importance of sharing their thoughts and feelings. If this describes your marriage, then do something about it. Guys, make a concerted effort to talk to your wives. Talk about nothing or everything – it doesn’t really matter. The key is to start communicating again. And wives, find a way to draw your husbands out, even if it means talking about football or race cars. Don’t let silence suffoca...

From FOCUS ON THE FAMILY TODAY • Wednesday • June 11, 2008 By Dr James Dobson Imagine two boats drifting together on a choppy lake. A man sits in one of them and a woman in the other. They have every intention of crossing the lake together because they genuinely care about each other. But slowly, they begin to drift apart. Each catches different currents and gusts of wind that turn their little boats in opposite directions. Before they know it, one person is at the north end of the lake and the other bobs along at the south. They can hardly communicate without shouting from such a great distance. And by then, there are a number of children in a third boat, little bewildered children. This is a dramatic analogy to the plight of too many marriages today. Husbands and wives begin their journey side by side, with every intention of remaining together for a lifetime. But the pressures of everyday living turn them in their own directions and towards their own pursuits, and away from each oth...

From FOCUS ON THE FAMILY, Today, 05-Jun-2008 edition COURT YOUR SPOUSE By Dr Bill Maier How well do you build up your mate’s self-esteem? Drs Les and Leslie Parrott have written a great book called The Love List. In it, they outline some powerful ideas to make your spouse feel special. For instance, try looking for ways to praise your husband or wife. It doesn’t have to be a big deal, just a simple word of encouragement. Tell them, “You look really great today,” or “I really appreciate what a great Mum you are.” When you’re with friends, make it a point of bringing up one of your spouse’s good qualities. Say something like, “Kelly is an amazing cook. You should try her lasagna.” You’ll be surprised how many brownie points you score with a simple compliment. When you’re alone, don’t forget to tell your spouse how much you love them. All of us need to know that we’re loved and appreciated. Everyone likes to be courted, even if they’ve been married for 20 years.