Dealing with 'nesters'

By Dr Bill Maier

There’s a reason why mother birds push their babies out of the nest. If she didn’t, some of them would never leave. A lot of grown children are the same way. When they’re 15, they’re chomping at the rein to grow up, but then 25 comes around and they’re still hanging around the house. There’s nothing wrong with letting grown children stay, as long as you’ve taken the time to define some important ground rules.

First, the arrangement must be mutually agreeable. Let them know that having a key to your door is a privilege, not an eternal right.

And second, they need to take on the role of an adult. Tell them they’re welcome to live in your house, but only as an adult boarder. They should be expected to take care of their own cleaning and expenses.

Treating grown kids like children only stifles their growth and maturity, and that’s not good for anyone — especially your child.


From TODAY, Voices - Friday, 04-June-2010
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