Dialogue to know your kids better

From TODAY, Voices
Tuesday, 10-March-2009

By Dr Bill Maier


There is a big difference between “talking” and “dialoguing”. Most of us spend plenty of time talking to our kids, but do we spend enough time in active dialogue? The difference is, dialoguing gets us past the surface and into deeper issues of the heart. It is taking the time to ask sincere questions about how our kids are doing and how they feel about certain issues. And it is the backbone of any good relationship.

And dialoguing is a two-way street. Not only are you getting to know your kids on a deeper level, you are allowing them to see inside your heart as well. Parents tend to think that lecturing is the best way to teach and when kids are very young, that may be the case. But as kids get older and start to think for themselves, they respond better to active dialogue. When we engage them in conversation on a personal level, we are teaching them what it means to truly care for others. And we are instilling relational habits that will stick with them for a lifetime.