Posts

Take charge of your emotions

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Image via Wikipedia By Dr Bill Maier Having another blue day today? Don’t worry, you’ll feel better. But don’t be surprised if your child misbehaves tomorrow. A new study has found that the day after mum acts sad or angry in front of her children , they are more likely to be defiant and inattentive. Children pick up on our mood and it affects how they feel. When they act out, often they are just reacting to what they have seen from us. Everyone gets sad from time to time but moping around does not make things any better. Try getting yourself out of the house for a while. A walk around the block is a great way to relieve stress or anxiety . Or take the children to the park and let them play while you relax in the shade with a good book. You might even surprise them by chasing them around the playground. It is difficult to stay sad when you are playing and having fun. From TODAY, Voices - Friday, 16-July-2010 ----- Related articles by Zemanta When Anxiety Hits, Do...

Fun junk food

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Image via Wikipedia By Dr Bill Maier These days it’s hard to turn around without someone reminding you to watch your fat and cholesterol . Junk food has become a dirty word. But in the real world, kids love things like pizza and soft drinks , and big bowls of ice cream . Well, there are ways to let your kids have fun while still minimising the damage. Instead of banning cookies, limit them to one or two a day. And there are great tasting light ice creams on the market. There’s also nothing wrong with having pizza on Friday nights. Just serve carrot sticks or a fruit salad first. And try ordering a veggie pizza — your kids may surprise you and actually like it! From TODAY, Voices - Thursday, 15-July-2010 ----- Related articles by Zemanta National Junk Food Day is Today (techeblog.com) Hotdog Days of Summer? (lifescript.com) Trigger Foods That Make You Fat (lifescript.com) Junk food equivalents of sugary drinks (flowingdata.com) Back to School (socyberty.co...

Be honest with adopted child

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By Dr Bill Maier When is the best time to tell a child that they were adopted ? I get asked this question often from adoptive parents, and my answer is always the same: As soon as they’re old enough to understand. Obviously, it’s important to use age-appropriate language. When the child is two or three, make sure they understand how special they are to you. Say to them: “Mummy and daddy chose you over all the other children in the world.” When they’re a little older, you might start explaining the difference between a biological and an adoptive parent. A four-year-old could be told that some kids have two different mums — one who took care of them inside her tummy, and another who took them home from the hospital to love and care for them. Adoptive kids will find out sooner or later. And if you’ve kept it a secret, they’ll wonder what else you haven’t told them. So, be as honest as you can from the earliest age. From TODAY, Voices - Wednesday, 14-July-2010 ----- Re...

Negotiating flexi-time

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By Dr James Dobson Not all mums can stay home with their kids. But that doesn’t mean they have to settle for a poor work schedule. A lot of companies today are more child-friendly than we give them credit for. Sometimes, just asking for a change in schedule makes a lot of difference in the time we get to spend at home. And that change may take some negotiation, but it is worth the effort. Begin by learning all you can about your company ’s policy regarding flexitime. Then arrange a meeting with your boss to discuss your proposal. You may need to write your ideas on paper, so you don’t forget. And be specific. If you’re going to ask for a change, tell them exactly how you propose to do it while still getting your work done. Assure them that you’ll still be available for emergencies or additional work. Show your boss how it can be a win-win situation, and he’ll likely be more open to the idea than you might expect. From TODAY, Voices - Tuesday, 13-July-2010 ----- Related ...

Caring for baby’s teeth

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By Dr Bill Maier So how early should you start brushing your baby’s teeth ? That is easy – the first time you see a tooth. About one in five three-year-olds show signs of tooth decay . That is because many parents are not starting early enough to take care of their babies’ teeth. Most children get their first tooth around six months and that is the time to start brushing at least twice a day. For infants , use a soft cloth to rub the gum and teeth gently. Make sure you get all sides. When they get to be toddlers , it is time to start using a soft brush and a dab of toothpaste . You might want to get the non-fluoridated kind until they are able to spit it out. Around three, you can start teaching them to do it themselves but, even then, make sure you monitor the job they do. At least until they have the fine motor skills it takes to manoeuvre the brush alone. From TODAY, Voices - Monday, 12-July-2010 ----- Related articles by Zemanta Don't Scream Over Ice Cream...

The Comparison Trap

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By Dr James Dobson Have you played the “if only” game? It goes like this: If only my wife was more like Judy. She fixes exotic dinners, keeps a sparkling house and even goes golfing with her husband. Or if only my husband was like Johnny. He is always giving flowers to his wife, takes her dancing and does not slurp on his soup during dinner. What is wrong with comparisons like these? For one thing, the conclusions we draw are based on a distortion. We are equating the obvious flaws and shortcomings of a person we know intimately with the public image of the person we idealise. That individual is imperfect too, though it may not be as apparent across a crowded room. Besides, the comparison game insults our marriage partner and weakens the bond that makes a relationship successful. In other words, everyone loses when we engage in this mind game. We should seek to elevate each other as husband and wife: That’s the best way I know to make marriage go the distance. From TODAY, ...

Books vs community support

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By Dr James Dobson If you have checked out the parenting section of a bookstore lately, you’ve probably noticed hundreds of authors who want to tell you how to raise your children . Have you ever wondered if they really know more than you do? As a psychologist , I believe parents can learn from the specialists. But there is one thing a book will never provide, and that is one-on-one support from mums and dads who are going through the same thing. Our grandparents took it for granted that friends and family would always be there to help. But things have changed since then. These days, the best piece of advice I can give a new parent is: “Yes, read those books, but don’t stop there. Contact your local support group, hospital or family service centre and ask about parenting support groups .” You might find the encouragement and information our forefathers derived from large and loving families. Beyond that, I recommend that you go with your own instincts. You know more than...