GROWING RESPONSIBLE KIDS

By Dr James Dobson

Marguerite and Willard Beecher, writing many years ago, offered two insightful recommendations to parents.

They said first, that a parent needs to gain his or her freedom from the child, so that the child can obtain his or her freedom from the parent. Second, they said that a parent should do nothing for a child that the child can profit from doing himself or herself.

Now, there's great wisdom in those words. A newborn is, of course, completely helpless. But about 20 years later, he or she should have developed the skills and the self-discipline necessary for independent adult living.

In other words, during the short course of childhood, an individual should progress from complete dependency to independency, from irresponsibility to responsibility. It comes by preparing the child day by day for the eventual moment of release.

The Beechers said that parents who continue their servitude as the child matures may be handicapping him or her for life. So a primary objective of parenthood is, quite simply, to work yourself out of a job.

From TODAY, Voices – Thursday, 28-May-2009

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