Friday, December 12, 2008

BONDING DURING COURTSHIP

From TODAY, Voices

Thursday December 11, 2008

 

By Dr James Dobson

 

When I was a kid, I always wanted to build a model airplane out of balsa like my friends did, but I was never successful. Why? Simply because I was too impatient to wait for the glue to dry. I just couldn’t keep my hands off the pieces long enough for them to congeal.

 

A researcher, Dr Desmond Morris, spent years trying to determine why some couples have difficulty experiencing true intimacy together. He found that the problem can usually be traced to courtship days when the bond between young men and women failed to develop. What interfered with that bond? It was the tendency to rush into physical intimacy too early in the relationship.

 

Instead of taking the time to know each other to talk, laugh, and share their lover’s secrets, they began passionate kissing on the first date and were in bed shortly thereafter.

 

This rush to sexual experimentation actually interferes with the development of emotional intimacy and it continues to weaken the marital bond even years later.

 

The bottom line is this: Couples expecting to marry someday should slow down the progression of their physical relationship. Friendship must come first if the bond is to be cemented.

 

In other words, they need to wait for the glue to dry. 

 

Post a Comment