Mi Choza De Nipa

From TODAY, Voices, I Say Thursday July 31, 2008 Finding it is simply a matter of managing one’s expectations, readers say Ansley Ng ansley@mediacorp.com.sg MY COLUMN last Friday (Helping singles meet singles) drew letters of encouragement, robust disagreement and some unorthodox suggestions. Among the responses from single and married women, married men and even mothers worried about their single daughters’ lack of a social life, there were several interesting propositions and suggestions. Among several date requests, one female reader who was worried about her buddy’s nonchalance at being single sent her friend’s photo and email address, asking me to write her friend in the hope that we might hit it off. Another concerned male reader urged me to spend Saturday night prowling bars and clubs, even if I had to “hunt” alone. If that failed, he added, I should head for Geylang. But last Saturday night, instead of roaming the red light district for durians, and instead of spilling wine whi...

From TODAY, Voices Thursday July 31, 2008 By Dr Bill Maier Still looking for a reason to quit smoking? Well, here’s a good one – your kids! We’ve known for years how bad cigarette smoke is for health, yet in spite of all the warnings, many parents still smoke. And they’re doing it around their kids. Studies have shown that even second hand smoke can cause health problems, including lung cancer. And that’s not all: A recent study of over 4,000 kids showed that cigarette smoke actually lowered their IQ. Even small amounts of residual smoke can reduce thinking skills and hinder language and speaking ability. Babies are the most vulnerable. Their brains develop during the early years and second hand smoke can do permanent harm. If you’re still hanging on to an unhealthy habit, do yourself and your family a big favour: Kick the cigarette habit now, before it’s too late.

From TODAY, Voices, I Say Thursday July 31, 2008 Parents-to-be who are going through tough times need support too Tee Bee Ling PICTURE: Expecting parents need more than just financial support. TODAY FILE PHOTO IN LESS than two months, my baby will be born. But unlike other most other babies, mine was diagnosed when he was only 19 weeks old as having a hole in the heart as well as a “missing” oxygen vessel. The world has come crashing down for my husband and I. After numerous growth scans, the missing vessel in the heart still cannot be detected. An operation cannot be performed if it cannot be found. We sought a second medical opinion and the answer was the same — there is not much hope for my unborn son. The only hope he might have is in the United States. We were asked if we would consider an abortion but we couldn’t bear to do it. We could see the development of our baby’s hands, legs, body, head. He even showed us his “playful” side in the growth scan — he blew a bubble and sucked ...

From TODAY, World Thursday July 31, 2008 AIDS IN ASIA Aids infections among Asian gays are now at the same levels that hit the homosexual communities in the United States during the late ’80s. EPA Top UN officials urge for more preventive action UNITED NATIONS — HIV infection rates among gay men in many parts of Asia are as severe as those which devastated homosexual communities in the United States in the late ’80s, said top officials of the United Nations Aids agency Unaids. Launching his agency’s 2008 report on the global Aids epidemic, Mr Peter Piot, executive director of Unaids, urged more action to prevent the spread of the disease among gay men who have unsafe sex. He also stressed the importance of working with affected communities. Mr Piot said: “All over Asia there are now epidemics of HIV in men who have sex with men, at the same magnitude that we saw in this country 25 years ago. There is not enough action yet but we are now starting programmes.” Mr Paul De Lay, director of...

From TODAY Wednesday July 30, 2008 By Dr Bill Maier Too many married couples see counseling as a last-ditch effort, instead of a tool to strengthen their relationship. People have a lot of strange ideas when it comes to therapy. They imagine themselves lying on a couch in a stuffy office. But that’s just a stereotype. Counselling isn’t as awkward or severe as most people believe. A counsellor’s role is to give you a better understanding of yourself and your situation. This awareness helps you see things more clearly, so you can make better choices, or take steps to change how you react to certain circumstances. And counselling isn’t for crazy people, or marriages on the verge of divorce – it’s for any couple that wants their marriage or family life to be the best that it can be. All couples go through struggles, and the sooner you deal with those things, the better. A good counsellor can help you work through little issues before they become big ones.

From TODAY, Voices, I Say Wednesday July 30, 2008 Single mum says it’s tough looking for love with a child and ‘history’ in tow Nat Sim* I REFER to “Helping singles meet singles” (July 25) and “Who will grow old with you?” (July 28). If Ansley Ng thinks he is in a tough position in looking for the right partner, I would ask him to consider my position, a divorced mum with a 6-year-old son. At least Mr Ng has the freedom to go out on a Saturday night to rent videos. At least he has the freedom to make choices and mistakes more easily than I do. (My potential partner has to love both me and my son). In the midst of all the talk about making babies and getting Singaporeans to marry, I believe I echo a neglected group when I say that we have it the toughest. Lest I am misunderstood, I will firstly say that I love my son with all my heart, and I have no regrets having him. But as a single parent, I do not have a partner to help me. There is just me who cleans the house and cooks; who feeds,...

From TODAY, World Wednesday July 30, 2008 FRESNO (California) — Just like how people damage their skin in the sun, produce can also get nasty burns. That’s why farmers are increasingly applying sunscreen to their crops to prevent skin blistering, heat stress and blemishes. Sunspots on a Granny Smith apple can mean the difference between the lowest price for juice or the more lucrative fresh fruit market. As for nuts, buyers last year paid on average 3 cents (5 cents) per 500g more for sunscreenprotected nuts than untreated ones, said grower Ed Lagrutta as he stood in the bed of his Chevy Silverado, inspecting a San Joaquin Valley walnut grove in its second year of sunscreen tests. With yields topping more than 900 kg per 4,000 square metres, it adds up, he said. Climate change and drought in Australia and California’s Central Valley have meant challenging growing conditions for farmers that are affecting the quality, yields and price of produce. Sunscreens alleviate at least one worry ...

Here's the link to the original article Helping Singles Meet Singles .

From TODAY, Voices Thursday July 24, 2008 CHILDCARE What regulations exist to ensure children are well taken care of? Letter from Heng Liling RECENT discussions regarding fertility rates and changing mindsets seem to revolve around financial support and benefits, but do not seem to answer the question of how to match parents’ high expectations for the health, safety and education of their child against the quality of the childcare providers in the market place. After all, when all the dust has settled, the question remains: Who will look after Baby? I am a working mother. My toddler goes to a school which has an infant care programme and has been there since she was 2 months old. It is an economic decision and a difficult choice to make — leaving your child in the hands of strangers whom you can only hope will take good care of him or her. I can only trust my instincts and even in the best of hands, accidents happen. Therefore, apart from childcare support for the parents, more could b...

From Voices TODAY, Monday July 28, 2008 SARAH SUM-CAMPBELL ANSLEY Ng’s lament in “Helping singles meet singles” (July 25) put a smile on my face. He sounds like a “typical” Singaporean who, without the right incentives dangling before him, is unable to muster enough oomph to follow his heart. Social skills and the art of relating is something one acquires, much like table manners. When babies first learn how to eat, they smear food all over their mouths and get mucky and dirty. Much like the process of finding a mate, I reckon. A person looks at a spread before him/her and asks if it’s all that worthwhile diving in and getting mucky and dirty in the process of learning about another person. Then there are the mistakes made, heartaches and starting over if the relationship does not work. Finding a mate and being together is a process. The most rewarding thing about being with a partner and raising a child is that deep sense of belonging and acceptance. In a good marriage, each endeavour...

From TODAY, TUESDAY July 29, 2008 By Dr James Dobson There’s nothing better than a great marriage. But great marriages take a lot of work. We all go through times that are tough and challenging, and even the closest relationships can get strained. Sometimes people lose jobs or businesses, or suffer a devastating injury. Other times the busyness of life gets in the way, causing physical and emotional stress. At this point, instead of leaning on each other, couples start to pull away, causing feelings of pain and rejection. When that happens, just being aware of the potential problems can do wonders for preventing them. And communication is your strongest defence against trouble. Instead of letting hard times come between you, see them as opportunities to strengthen your relationship. Talk to your spouse and loved ones about what’s going on in your life, and let them help you through it. Going through hardship alone is just a formula for trouble.

From TODAY, MONDAY July 28, 2008 By Dr Bill Maier If you want your teenagers to do well in college, make sure they have some sense of direction before they get there. Kids who know what they want to do with their careers are much more likely to succeed in higher education. And the time to help them figure that out is during the high school years. Encourage your teen to explore different career opportunities. If your child has an interest in medicine, there are numerous opportunities to see what it would be like to work in the medical field. They could volunteer at a local blood bank, hospital, or a free clinic. Nursing homes and children’s hospitals are always in need of interns. Kids who love animals might contact the zoo or animal shelter. Talk to your teen about their interests, and help them get started exploring their future careers today.