Friday, May 29, 2009

CHILDCARE DILEMMA

By Dr James Dobson

Imagine the shock one single mum felt when she walked into her daughter's day care facility and found her wearing her soiled underwear on top of her head, a punishment the provider imposed when the child had an "accident".

We've all heard horror stories of day-care facilities that abuse or neglect children when parents are not watching. This unnerves every loving parent who must rely on others to care for their children during the day.

If you're one of them, you must learn to evaluate the people you entrust your most precious possession to five days a week. You can begin by checking to see what your country's licencing laws are and what criteria a caregiver must meet. Before you leave your little one, you should observe the caregiver interacting with children for a minimum of two hours. Most importantly, drop in unannounced to check what the care is like when you're not around. And keep your ears open to what your child says.

There are many wonderful caregivers out there who truly love children. With careful attention, I'm sure you'll make a good choice for your family.

From TODAY, Voices – Friday, 29-May-2009


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Thursday, May 28, 2009

GROWING RESPONSIBLE KIDS

By Dr James Dobson

Marguerite and Willard Beecher, writing many years ago, offered two insightful recommendations to parents.

They said first, that a parent needs to gain his or her freedom from the child, so that the child can obtain his or her freedom from the parent. Second, they said that a parent should do nothing for a child that the child can profit from doing himself or herself.

Now, there's great wisdom in those words. A newborn is, of course, completely helpless. But about 20 years later, he or she should have developed the skills and the self-discipline necessary for independent adult living.

In other words, during the short course of childhood, an individual should progress from complete dependency to independency, from irresponsibility to responsibility. It comes by preparing the child day by day for the eventual moment of release.

The Beechers said that parents who continue their servitude as the child matures may be handicapping him or her for life. So a primary objective of parenthood is, quite simply, to work yourself out of a job.

From TODAY, Voices – Thursday, 28-May-2009


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NIGHT TERRORS

By Dr James Dobson

Have you ever been awakened in the middle of the night by a boy or girl who was obviously terrified but couldn't tell you why? That child may have just experienced what's known as a "night terror," which is very different from a nightmare.

It's important to understand the difference. If children are awakened in the middle of the night by a nightmare, they can usually describe the story and tell you what was so scary about it. Then they can be comforted and tucked in for the rest of the night.

But youngsters in the midst of night terrors usually can't be brought to consciousness, even though they may sit up straight in bed with their eyes open.

It appears that night terrors occur in what is known as Stage Four sleep, which is deeper and farther from consciousness than any other human experience. Nightmares, on the other hand, occur in Stage Three sleep, which means they're closer to consciousness.

The good news is that there appear to be no physical or psychological problems associated with night terrors. You can, in fact, prevent them with a mild dose of medication. However, most physicians don't recommend doing that unless they're disturbing the parents' Stage Four sleep.

From TODAY, Voices – Wednesday, 27-May-2009




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Wednesday, May 27, 2009

A TRUE LOVE STORY

And this one story, though it will be covered over by the passing years, its relevance will always be fresh… man's heart is always a heart of flesh, whether the clothes worn outside will someday go back to metallic sheets and plates…

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By Dr James Dobson

Every now and then, I come across a love story worth remembering. Let me share one with you that you may have read about in Reader's Digest.

It began when a man named Kim met a young woman named Kris Ann. Her nickname was Kricket. The two instantly connected. In April 1993, Kim proposed. They were married that September.

Ten weeks later, tragedy struck. A serious car accident left Kricket in a coma. Doctors expected her to die, but, to everyone's surprise, she survived.

Unfortunately, her memory was severely damaged. Through time, she recalled bits and pieces of her life, but the last year was wiped from her consciousness, including all memories of Kim and their wedding.

But Kim refused to give up. He decided to win her heart all over again. He started from the beginning, courting Kricket one day at a time.

On Valentine's Day 1996, two years after their wedding, he once again got down on one knee and proposed to Kricket. They renewed their vows in May that year.

In a time when culture beckons to us to bail out when things get tough, it was inspirational to see this young couple hang in there and work to rebuild what they had lost.

Kim and Kricket showed us that love is worth preserving, even in the aftermath of tragedy.

From TODAY, Voices – Tuesday, 26-May-2009

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not exactly related, but below is a story of a very traggic car accident... the lady in our story above was fortunate to have survived, albeit not without some damages...


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Monday, May 25, 2009

Don’t quit now

By Dr James Dobson

FocusOnTheFamily_LogoSmall Have you ever thought about how long it takes to raise a human being and get him or her ready for independent living?

It takes us 20 years or more to try to produce a son or daughter who can earn a living and stay out of trouble and make normal adult decisions.

Seriously, we probably won’t find many shortcuts, for the simple reason that there aren’t any. Let’s face it: This child-rearing task is the most long-term project we will ever attempt. And like any other long-term task, the important thing is not to give up, but to persevere, and reach the joy of the finish line.

Why have I chosen to offer this advice today? Because there are many voices out there telling parents to give up; to bail out; to think only of themselves. And there will be many discouraging moments along the way.

But as the father of two grown kids, I can tell you that the childhood years pass ever so quickly; yet the rewards of doing that parenting job properly will last for a lifetime.

From TODAY, Voices – Monday, 25-May-2009




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