Monday, May 04, 2009


By Dr James Dobson

There is nothing wrong with feeling good about our children's success. But problems can crop up when a kid's performance is driven by parental ego. This can be seen when a child has to keep winning in order to maintain respect and love from his parents.

Boys and girls should know that they are accepted simply because of their own unique worth.

I am reminded of John McKay, a former football coach at the University of Southern California (USC). I saw him being interviewed on television some years ago when his son, John Jr, was a successful football player on the USC team. The interviewer had asked Coach McKay to comment on the pride that he must have felt over his son's accomplishments.

His answer was most impressive. "Yes," he replied. "I'm pleased that John had a good season last year. He does a fine job and I'm proud of him. But I would be just as proud if he had never played the game at all."

Coach McKay was saying, in effect, that John's football talent is recognised and appreciated, but his human worth does not depend on the ability to play football. Thus, his son would not lose his respect if the next season brought failure and disappointment. John's place in his dad's heart was secure, being independent of his performance.

I wish every child could say the same.

From TODAY, Voices – Friday, 01-May-2009
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